As I came home from an afternoon of running errands I saw it: An Amazon Prime box had been delivered. But it was strange; instead of sitting idly on the front step, it was floating about three feet above the ground.
This time I congratulate myself for not believing a hallucination, blink while it vanishes and walk into the house. Since hitting my head and getting a TBI, the last several months have been anything but boring. A few days previously I had noticed a large road sign was half gone. Oh my, I murmured to myself, A dinosaur must have eaten that sign.
I’d like to consider myself at least a semi-educated person. I went to college for a number of years that I can’t remember, earned a Master’s degree in history and was involved in several honors programs. I remind myself of that while I continue driving. The dinosaurs died a long time ago, right.
Moments like this are a bit unnerving, but since I always remember the truth about reality within a moment, it isn’t so bad. Sometimes it is like Christmas. In mid-summer my mother visited. When I was around her, or anyone from my family, I would often forget recent developments about my life. Namely, that I am now 32 and married with children. As she was leaving my house and heading to her car, I inwardly groaned. I don’t want to go home; I’d rather stay here, thinking that I was a teenager, about to return to my old bedroom. Matt walked by. As soon as I saw him, a decade unfolded in my mind: Wait! I am an adult; I am married! I am married to him!”
There were other times that I forgot who I was. I remember lying in bed asking myself, I know I am married, but to whom? Again, it only took a few seconds to remember my husband of eight years, so it wasn’t that bad. Or was it?
When I was tired everything became a blur. I would slip in and out of consciousness while still awake. I noticed (for the first time) the wall sized television that we owned (we do not own a wall-sized television), tried not to step on our cat on the way to the bathroom (we do not own a cat) and I never could quite remember without having to think, What season was it? Summer, winter, spring? Where do I live? What house is this? How old am I? Thankfully, I would always get the right answers without having to ask my poor husband.
Once, I was washing my hair. I closed my eyes to feel the water running over my head. In that second, I was transported. I was no longer in the bathroom; it was a warm summer day. I was standing in the middle of the most luxurious rose garden. It felt perfect, then I opened my eyes. Uh, oh. I was still in the shower. While it would make a splendid advertisement for the quality fragrance of my shampoo, I wouldn’t recommend the experience.
My mind is now a lot more clear. I haven’t believed anything crazy, like that I was standing next to a pack of wolves (I wasn’t even scared), for a couple of weeks. The forgetful symptoms were all parts of my brain injury, while seeing things was mostly from the medicine that I was taking. The brain is amazing. The work it goes to rewire itself after an injury is incredible. Though I would not like to have another brain injury, I can at least say that it has been an interesting experience!